Cats are back in the headlines, this time taking fall-guy status in the Great Windmill-Bird Debate of ’07. It’s enough to make you want to pull a Quixote on whatever windmill executive came up with this latest spin of anti-cat PR.
Okay, cats have a song bird problem, it’s true. The problem is, there is something undeniably attractive about slaughtering little singers who can’t help but give themselves away with the essence of what makes them song birds, their lovely little voices.
But the main problem is not the song, the bird, or the cat. These three are but an innocent catastrophe waiting to happen, set into motion by nature herself, and diverted into a force 90 million housecats strong by none other than the species voted most likely to change the planet’s climate this century.
It’s hard enough we have to blame ourselves for how bad things have gotten around old Earth here, and it only makes it worse when we shift responsibility to the creatures we keep. I’m telling you, cats are blameless — the blood they spill is all on us.
Personally, I don’t mind curbing my little killer’s freedom by keeping him inside so I don’t have to handle the guilt that comes along with the dead bodies on my doormat. I keep my cats inside as well, you’ll be glad to know.
As for Mr. Windmill PR spin executive, shame on you for using cats to take the heat off your clean-energy industry. That’s about as useful as Quixote busting a cap in some windmill’s backside, although not nearly as entertaining and literarily significant.
But there is one cat who can kill windmills… and that’s Bernie the half-cyborg cat.